Learn ten categories once. Steer any conversation after that.
Every card in every deck belongs to one of ten categories, and every category has a fixed color. That’s the whole system. It’s printed on the cards, it’s in the app, and it works the same way at a dinner table or in a car.
Phones down. One card picked.
There is no rulebook and no timer. This is what a good twenty minutes looks like.
- 01
Start light. Joy or Memories.
Never open a cold table with Ethics. Pull a yellow or an orange card and let people warm up while they think somebody else is being asked.
- 02
Everybody answers the same card.
Don’t deal cards out. One question, around the table, including whoever picked it. The repetition is what makes people honest — the fourth answer is always better than the first.
- 03
Go one level deeper, once.
After a good answer, ask the follow-up. Then stop. Don’t stack them — two follow-ups in a row turns a conversation into an interview.
- 04
End on Speak Life.
Pink card, last. Somebody says the good thing out loud to somebody’s face. It’s the difference between a nice chat and a night people bring up months later.
Ten categories, ten colors.
Same set in every deck. The questions change; the colors never do.
Insight
Questions that make someone notice something they already knew.
What’s something you changed your mind about this year?
Identity
Who you are when nobody is assigning you a role.
What do people get wrong about you?
Memories
The stories that only get told if somebody asks.
Share a happy memory from your childhood.
Growth
Progress, effort, and the parts still under construction.
Name a thing you’re better at than a year ago.
Ethics
The hard hypotheticals. Great with teenagers, risky with strangers.
Is it ever right to lie to someone you love?
Speak Life
Say the good thing out loud, to their face, right now.
Tell the person on your left what you admire in them.
Emotions
Naming the feeling instead of describing the situation.
When did you last feel genuinely proud?
Joy
Light, fast, and the safest place to start a cold table.
What’s the best part of this week, so far?
Dreams
The version of the future nobody has asked them about.
If money didn’t matter, where would you live for a year?
Hot Takes
Opinions, arguments, laughing. Use sparingly. It runs hot.
Overrated or underrated: family group chats. Go.
Let the app design the moment.
You know the system. Some nights you don’t want to run it. Describe the situation and the app builds the sequence for you.
“Driving Jake to practice, twenty minutes, he’s been quiet all week.”
Pacing note: don’t stack them. End positive, no probing.
Same system, different rooms.
Family Pack ships today. Three more decks are in production.